You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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