Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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