i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Randomize
