i think i have herpe
just one?
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
