Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
