She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
