I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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