Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
SOS YOU NEED TO TAKE THE CANDY PANTIES OUT OF THE GLOVE COMPARTMENT BEFORE MOM TAKES MY CAR
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
