I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
