Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Randomize
