then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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