Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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