The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
