Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
