Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Randomize