No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
From scraping the remnants from a coke bag at a lingerie party to meeting with an 80 year old man to discuss civil rights all in under 12 hours bizarrely feels like the epitome of my life
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Randomize
