Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize