i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
