My nipple is on Facebook.
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
