yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
this boner is fucking legendary. i should name it and celebrate its birthday every year
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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