I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
