Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
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