is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Randomize
