how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
woke up this morning with a big mac and chips on a plate, coke in a glass and a knife and fork AND NAPKIN waiting for me in front of my computer. PORN WAS ALREADY PLAYING. I LOVE DRUNK ME
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Randomize
