He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
It wasn't a basement apartment, it's his parents basement. And he wanted to show me his pet tarantula collection. I NOPED THE FUCK OUT!
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
You are a genius and a whore.
Randomize
