K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
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