Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
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