At least make sure they are 18
Why
Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Randomize
