I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
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