I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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