I murdered the dance floor call the cops
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
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