This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
Randomize