Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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