It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
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