do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
