I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
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