And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Randomize
