I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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