he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize