can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
