oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize