i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
