used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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