I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Randomize
