I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
Randomize
