She announced her abortion via fbk
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
