No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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