my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
Randomize
