If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
