Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Randomize
