it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize